The first in a series on the Core Qualities of the ATA Enneagram
By Mario Sikora
Vitality is the feeling of being alive. It is the power to endure, possessing of a lively and animated character; it is the capacity to live and develop, to possess physical and mental vigor.
It is also the Core Quality associated with point Eight of the ATA Enneagram.
The Enneagram is typically thought of as a model of nine different kinds of people, and while it is that, it is more. In the Awareness to Action Approach, it is also a model of nine elements or “qualities” of each of us as well as being a model of life and leadership competencies. (For more on this, see “The Introduction to the Awareness to Action Enneagram on our EnneagramOnDemand portal.)
The Core Qualities are aspects of human nature that exist in an immature form in each one of us when we are born. The process of socialization early in life leads to a stunting of these qualities—they become hindered and their maturation slows. While we all feel the stunting of all nine qualities, we feel one of them—the one associated with the point of our Enneagram type—most acutely. Thus, Eights feel the stunting of vitality more acutely than they do the other eight qualities and many of the challenges Eights wrestle with are the result of a deeply rooted feeling of inner deadness that developed as the stunting of their vitality continued early in their lives.
This may seem strange on first reading—Who is more robust and energetic than Eights, after all? They are forceful and passionate people, energetic and robust. They are action-oriented and, sometimes, excessive people who live loud and large. Eights seem to be the epitome of vitality.
But, when we look deeper, we see that things are more complicated than they seem.
First, though, we must understand that immature vitality and mature vitality are different.
Immature vitality is undirected, unskilled, and often unintentional. The young child feels impulses and acts on those feelings. When a young child wants something they take it; when they are hungry they attempt to eat; when they want to go somewhere they take off heedlessly in that direction. When they are happy they let the world know with robust laughter and when they are upset they know no bounds in expressing their displeasure. They are like a firehose with no one holding onto the nozzle—spraying indiscriminately and making a mess.
Mature vitality, however, is intentional, directed, and managed. Mature vitality is marked by an intangible feeling of relaxed but vibrant “aliveness,” by the energy to engage with the world in a sustained and persistent way. It includes the possession and management of relaxed but firm physical, emotional, and intellectual boundaries. People expressing mature vitality have the strength to endure what life brings their way and the will to exert themselves on their environment, which they do in ways that empower others and create positive change. People with vitality are relaxed, fluid, and strong; their energy is applied intentionally and coherently, rather than being inconsistent, sporadic, and unpredictable.
Mature vitality is the firehose held and pointed at the source of the fire.
The young child, however, is immature and expresses their vitality accordingly. In an ideal world, their vitality would mature naturally as they do. But this is not the world we live in and the seemingly (to the parent, at least) constant activity of the young child can become exhausting to its caretakers. The child starts to get messages that they need to reign in their energy. They are told to stop running, to keep quiet, to calm down. They go to school and are told to sit in a chair and listen. They look out the window and long to go out and play and explore and feel but are restricted from doing so.
They start to learn that their immature and unfiltered vitality causes a response that feels like the withholding of love and support from the very people they depend on for those things. So they start to constrain themselves and the natural maturation of their vitality becomes stunted. Since vitality is the feeling of aliveness, a feeling of inner deadness can take hold. Attempts are made to fill the void with immature expressions of vitality such as impulsiveness, recklessness, forcefulness, dominance, and excess.
And while we all feel this to some extent, it is the inner landscape of the Eight—an inner battle to keep the feeling of deadness away while they seek to recapture the feeling of being alive and (if they are working on themselves) to develop a more mature version of vitality.
Growth for the Eight, and for the rest of us, lies in nurturing the maturation of vitality. There are several ways to cultivate mature vitality. Here are a few:
- Focus on your body and your senses. Vitality is a very physical quality. We can’t be vital if we are not attentive to our senses—what we are feeling, smelling, hearing, seeing, and tasting.
- Nurturing vitality starts with paying more attention to our senses and giving them new experiences—eating new things, seeing new places, listening to new music, etc. It means “being in touch with” our bodies rather than living in a world of ideas and abstractions.
- Practice some form of body awareness exercise, such as a grounding meditation that equips you to be aware of what your body is experiencing below the focus of your normal attention.
- Exercise. You don’t need to be an elite athlete, but you need to move and care for your body. Do something to increase your strength, flexibility and mobility, and your stamina. Start small but be persistent. Just do something!
- Learn to recognize the feeling of vitality when it arises and don’t stifle it. When you feel alive, express it. Watch for those lingering messages from long ago that cause us to feel embarrassed about it or reject it, and recognize those messages for what they are: outdated scripts that no longer serve us well.
- Use the Awareness to Action Process to rewrite your narratives about power and develop more adaptive behaviors, especially related to how you treat others and the compassion you show them. See the following for more on the Awareness to Action Process and how to apply it:
- This article: https://enneagram-on-demand.com/the-missing-piece-in-creating-change/
- My book, “Awareness to Action: The Enneagram, Emotional Intelligence, and Change.”
- Cultivate self-discipline and will.
- Self-discipline is usually thought of as a form of restriction (“I will not eat that piece of cake!”), but it is really the act of regulating or managing one’s behavior in the cause of improvement. While this may require negation or doing things that are unpleasant at times, self-discipline is best practiced when it is framed as a course of action toward a desired end (“I will eat five servings of fruits and vegetables each day so I feel better.”)
- Will is related to self-discipline, but is not quite the same. It is a disposition to act according to principles or ends; the power of control over one’s own actions or emotions to create an effect. Self-discipline is about managing ourselves in order to create will; which is the ability to act in the world intentionally and actively.
- We cultivate these qualities by creating clear action plans that recognize the slow and incremental nature of creating change, and implementing them. There is no easy way to do this; they require the effort to overcome inertia and build habits, but over time they become easier. (See this video for more:
Understanding the difference between immature and mature vitality, recognizing and rewriting our limiting beliefs about vitality so we don’t stifle it, and developing self-discipline and will enable the maturation of vitality. The more vitality we feel the easier self-discipline and will become. This work creates a virtuous cycle, but you have to make the effort to start the wheel turning or you will stay stunted.
Future articles will address the other core qualities, and the Awareness to Action Enneagram Podcast is posting a series of episodes on the topic. We are also considering a webinar series and practice group focused on the core qualities; if you are interested in participating in it, send us an email at info@awarenesstoaction.com and we’ll keep you posted.
